Thoughts for the Dawn...little pleasures of the mind, scribbled out of great inspirations from the hidden dungeon of her heart...

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

LOVE STORIES

"I Love You, Tamahome...in my solitude I search for your heroic face and I long for your smell. I linger at the sound of your voice...the mere mention of your name..."

That has been the longest deep thought I have managed to keep a steady look at...El Escritor is in love...

They say that at least once in your life you get to meet someone really special and when you lose that special someone, the person becomes the main character of a mystery tagging along with you in your voyage in life. Either you look for the very same person or that kind of person in another. Life is a MAZE. A QUEST. Did you ever stop to think about life in that way? I did and I still do.

I have also thought I have met someone very special in the past. It made me think twice when I met Tamahome. That is the name of Miyaka's love interest in the Japanese anime series Fushigi Yugi that my best friend Oweng let me watch some months ago. Tamahome, because he is always there to rescue me in my most unwanted state-of-mind. I call him Tamahome in the meantime...when I am still scared; to suppress the feelings waiting to reciprocate; to still experience his friendship...

I call him Tamahome in the meantime...BECAUSE HIS NAME IS FAR TOO BEAUTIFUL TO MENTION...

I have also somewhat thought in the past that my ONE GREAT LOVE was my SOULMATE. I did not stop to reckon that perhaps I could be mistaken with it. That it's possible my ONE GREAT LOVE and my SOULMATE is not one and the same. They are separate entities.

In the past my world would stop when my loved one is around. With Tamahome it's different...my world keeps moving and I continue to live...

Isn't life supposed to be complemented by love like that? How much of life and love combined have I really already learnt as of this time? Have I learnt anything at all? Will it be better this time around?

I was inspired to write again because of a beautiful text message shared to me by a very close friend, with which my courage had surged: (Thank you, Albert. I am including your epistle verbatim)


"Delaying hurts even more...

You thought he was the one whom you're going to spend your whole life with. You thought he was God's gift. But all you thought seems to be not what it should be.

He did and still does what it takes to earn your love because he loves you so much, even if he feels that there's a possibility of losing you in the future.

Just recently an unfinished business unexpectedly came back asking for second chance and full of promises of love through eternity. Memories and feelings with the unfinished business suddenly were bringing back causing confusion...

You decided to open up with first guy hoping everything will be fine. But it broke your heart to see him hurting and so you decided to stay with him for the meantime.

Now...in your heart first guy knows not where he stands because as time goes by, situation proves your love seems to grow cold amidst all efforts to show that it's not.

First guy fears of getting hurt by the person he loves so much, because he might not survive it. But if he would have to be hurt he prefers it to be as soon as possible, why?

Because...delaying hurts even more..."

-Albert Fernandez-


You said you did not have the courage to send it to her. That is okay. In some ways you still poured it out and still managed to share it to someone who could have been a total stranger to you. There are stories I have wanted to write about but never did...

To love, let go, learn and love again, these are what I was able to gain emotionally from this heartfelt write up.

If I knew her at that time I would tell her that she did not know what she was losing grip of, and if I knew you I would have said she did not deserve you. However, all of us have had about the same experience which shaped us into the better persons we are today.

So thanks to your inspired LOVE and LIFE. For once I was convinced completely that not all men are insensitive and that there are a few who can love truly. I admire your courage to let out such feelings. Your emotions are remarkable. She did not realize what value she took for granted TO HAVE YOU and TO LOSE YOU...

Thank you for making me realize that I can...

I am saying goodbye to Miguel, Bingbong, Yang, Nizar, Jimm, Jason, King Renzo, Galapagos, My Solstice, Julius Caesar...and the man who is constantly in my dreams...my Alexander...

I am ready for the next chapter unfolding...Hello Life. Hello Love.


http://therenalexander.blogspot.com/

© Theren Alexander 2009

18 comments:

Mark said...

This would have been a very good entry for a Valentine's Day Blog. It is either too early or too late when this posted. Wow. You are in love? The lonely traveler is in love! That is great news. So who is he? =)

BEN said...

I always believed in a perfect time for everything. This promises more heartwarming stories later I bet.

nina gallagher said...

Whoa! I'll call you this weekend! I want the full details!!!

dora said...

Me too! Fill me in =) I super love the emotions in this one blog. It is very expressive

Shaleemar said...

Ate, seryoso ka? Talaga lang ha? One of my favorites yung Fushigi Yugi, I did not know you like it pala. Dapat mabait yang si Tamahome mo. I don't want you to be hurt again. Take care, Ate. I miss you na

Michael Gamal Aziz said...

nice and inspiring
you should write books and novels .. i encourage u on doing that .. i wrote alot b4 but now its vanished almost...

nice article and i hope my name isnt embeded within the lines ;) :D hehe
nice really nice

Mellow said...

I have the same love story. Nice read. I was looking for Taylor Swift's Love Story on google when I stumbled on this. Great page layout too!

Anna Lea said...

Some guy. I hope my guy can sum up like that tsk tsk. Bihira na talaga ang mga hopeless romantics

Melissa said...

Sana naka move on na si Albert. Is he your Tamahome? Sana siya na lang hahaha! Ooops, may naaamoy ako na SELOS hehehe

Karlo Miguel said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Maia said...

Sarap siguro magkaroon ng isang Albert, pero mas masarap ang feeling ni Tamahome to be loved like that ng author hehehe. Well, LOVE is always a wonderful and achy feeling in one package. Whatever happens, what matters is that you have loved and loved in return sabi nga sa Moulin Rouge.

Just dropping by. I may not always comment but I am always reading your thoughts here...

Pauleen Anne said...

Theren dear, you are a BEAUTIFUL PERSON inside and out. Whoever does not see it with his naked eyes is a loser. You deserve only the BEST! So don't settle for anything less. Tamahome is good inspiration based on what you related the other night over the phone...but do not stagnate...

Travel...in your travels you may find that love you have longed for. I want to see you IN LOVE again.

Hanna said...

Amen. Can you believe Anne and I are having a dose of "YOUR' tazo mint starbucks while browsing your blogspot. Miss you girl. Yes! Fall in love already! Magpakasal ka na din in the process! Hahaha!

So exactly how many stickers do you have already? Race? LOL

Shaleemar said...

Ate here is what I can share to you based on our last phone conversation. He may be too good to be true but you have always been the one who kept saying that our lives should not begin and end with just one person. So consider this in your thoughts:

"LET THINGS GO. RELEASE THEM. DETACH YOURSELF FROM THEM. NOBODY PLAYS THIS LIFE WITH MARKED CARDS, SO SOMETIMES WE WIN AND SOMETIMES WE LOSE. DO NOT EXPECT ANYTHING IN RETURN, DO NOT EXPECT YOUR EFFORTS TO BE APPRECIATED, YOUR GENIUS TO BE DISCOVERED, YOUR LOVE TO BE UNDERSTOOD. IN THE END ONLY THREE THINGS MATTER: HOW YOU LOVED;HOW YOU LIVED;AND HOW GRACEFULLY YOU LET GO OF THINGS NOT MEANT FOR YOU."

You deserve someone who can love you back unconditionally without a second thought. Because you are indeed a beautiful person inside and out, I agree to that. The reason why people are drawn to you is because of your wisdom, understanding and love for life.

-albert- said...

Hi Theddy, my reader. Finally! Nagcomment na rin..haha.

I've always been fascinated by your works, your writings, your novel(s). Sabi ko nga say your stay with Convergys, although is a prestigious company, is still an understatement of your abilities and/or capabalities as a person or an artist. And being part on one of your crafts is joy for me, an honor. What more is that I'm part of your life, that's more than a blessing.

Thanks anyway for introducing me to your Tamahome. He says he wont hurt you. At sabi pa niya your one of the persons who contributes to his hapiness so what would it do to him if he hurts you.
(close kay Tamahome?)

Hopeless romantic daw? Hindi kaya!
(violent reaction? haha)
Choosy lang...hehe

...Thed, nothing has changed. Remember that.

Mark said...

Everytime I read you, I sometimes hope I can occupy your thoughts...

Theren Alexander said...

Thanks everyone for the comments!

@ Mark... with just your mystery you already have...in between sips of my coffee I get to think of you =)

Shaleemar said...

Albert, since close ka kay Tamahome please tell him not to hurt my ate and hope he means it, okay?